Love Letters to Humans (no. 87) — We Center What We Love

Today’s little reminder: We center what we love. (This may or may not be pleasing news.)

Where we place our attention is an agreement we make. We agree to nurture people, relationships, ideas and whole systems with our habitual attention. We make these agreements actively and diliberately or passively and absent-mindedly.

Either way, we make decisions about who and what we will attend. That which we attend consistently—our work, our judgments, our families, our friendships, our fears, our flaws, the future, the past, the news, our nemesis, our money, our medicine, our grievances, our goals, our gratitude, our ideas, our identities, our resources, our resentments, “them” and whatever they’re up to, or whoever else’s business we regularly mind—becomes our focus, our center, a relationship that defines us.

What is a relationship that defines us if not an expression and manifestation of love? Is it not a sideways attempt at connection even when we’re railing against someone, even we are angry, even when we have named our precious attention “hate”?


To what and whom are you giving your attention?

Whom (or what) have you agreed to love by centering them?

Are you satisfied with the agreements you’ve made?

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Relationship is. Right relationship nourishes.