Love Letter to Coaches (no. 35) — on Polarity and Gender

Coaches, therapists, teachers, healers, leaders:

We can talk about sexual and relational polarity without gender essentialism.

We can talk about assertiveness without it being an essentially masculine attribute (because it is not).

We can talk about receptiveness without it being an essentially feminine attribute (because it is not).

We can talk about all human attributes, choices, and ways of being and relating as elements of being fully human. We can engage as full-spectrum human beings and regard our clients, students, and patients as such.


ps. Within the binaries of cisheteropatriarchy and white supremacy, strength and power belong to masculinity and whiteness, nurturing and submission belong to femininity and Blackness and Indigeneity. If you are preaching and teaching divine masculinity or feminine empowerment and you’re not addressing patriarchy and white supremacy as systems that attempt to fragment humans by assigning them essential characteristics based on constructs of race and gender, you’re peddling fantasy.