Love Letters to Humans (no. 15) – on Spiritual Bypassing

Unless we are willing to forego connection, growth, community, and joy, I don’t believe we ever get to stop doing the deep work of self-inquiry and being with the uncomfortable feelings that accompany it.


Our labels and identities are contextual. I repeat, we are relational beings, and our identities exist in the context of our relationships to each other.

It seems to me that getting free of being vexed by our own identities starts with understanding and getting very honest about the power dynamics and social constructs and contexts that impact our perceptions of ourselves and others.

When we bypass, try to skip ahead to “peace and oneness” and ignore context, it is like insisting that we are capable of flight without taking the reality of gravity into account. No amount of flapping around and imagining the wind on our faces will overcome our refusal to understand physics… we will either never get off the ground, or we will launch ourselves off high places and then gravity will remind us of its very real presence in our human experience. Without acknowledgment and informed analysis, we remain at its mercy.

If you want to deepen your understanding and analysis of the social contexts that we currently live in, I wholeheartedly recommend Freedom School with Desiree Adaway.

If you want to work on the internal “stuff” in a way that does not bypass social context, Staci Jordan Shelton’s Unraveled sessions are life-changing.

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